KOALA CHATS WITH A FRIEND

[mokona]

Semi-lulzy conversation with a friend that couldn't go to sleep. Times like these are the only moments where you'll speak of the olympics, Twatlight, sacred vagos, a friend's STD ridden vago, sparkly sperm, ponderings of the bodily functions of vampires, and the stripper habits of another friend all in one conversation.

Warning: 90% of the convo is about Twatlight ...
DOES NOT CONTAIN SPOILERS; unless I was psychic in one of my past lives and that soul hasn't completed the boss fight.


Christie says:
i can't sleep!
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
watch some olympics to put you to sleep
Christie says:
i don't wanna
Christie says:
lol
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
well fucking complain
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
go clubbing
Christie says:
how will clubbing get me to sleep???
Christie says:
what are you doing?
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
watching the drumming part i somehow skipped over while watching the opening ceremonies
Christie says:
lol
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
watch the parade of nations
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
it'll make you sleepy
Christie says:
.............
Christie says:
i don't feeling like it
Christie says:
maybe i'll read a chapter of breaking dawn
Christie says:
lol
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
well then don't fucking complain that you can't sleep
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
gross
Christie says:
HAHA
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
go do that
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
bad fanfiction
Christie says:
6 chapters of honeymooning
Christie says:
lol
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
6 complete chapters of badly written smut?
Christie says:
mmhmm
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
that's gotta be fucking painful to read
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
SIX COMPLETE CHAPTERS?!
Christie says:
it is
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
then wry read it?
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
D=
Christie says:
idk
Christie says:
i want to know what happens
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
they marry
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
they sex it up
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
she probably gets kidnapped
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
she gets saved
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
the end
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
or all of Edward's enemies are after her vago
Christie says:
vago?
Christie says:
so she's not a vampire?
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
no ...
Christie says:
what happens in jacob's part?
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
she's not a vampire
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
LOL
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
he dies?
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
that the werewolf?
Christie says:
he does?!
Christie says:
yeah the werewolf
Christie says:
lol
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
yeah
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
he dies
Christie says:
...
Christie says:
how?
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
protecting Bella?
Christie says:
lol
Christie says:
does edward kill him?
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
no, one of the enemies after her sacred vago kill him
Christie says:
what the heck is vago?
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
vagina
Christie says:
LOL
Christie says:
really?
Christie says:
no way...
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
i say vago all the time foo ....
Christie says:
no
Christie says:
i mean why are they affter it
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
when i say angel has a vago full of STDs
Christie says:
hasn't it been broken by edwards peener
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
they kidnap her before he scores in the honeymoon
Christie says:
nuh uh
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
unless they smexed it up before wedlock?
Christie says:
in the honeymoon they've had sex like tres times already
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
that's gross ... and highly unrealistic
Christie says:
lol
Christie says:
so how can they be after her "scared vagina"?
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
sacred*
Christie says:
lol
Christie says:
yeah
Christie says:
sacred
Christie says:
my bad
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
well ... cause now the vago is full of edward's sacred sparkles?
Christie says:
.........
Christie says:
can he produce sperm if he's like..technically dead...
Christie says:
do vampires pee?
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
well he can go out in sunlight ... so i'm sure he must be able to produce sperm?
Christie says:
idk
Christie says:
can he poop?
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
you read the book, you tell me
Christie says:
they never mention anything about that though
Christie says:
he like goes in the sun and he hunts
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
does Bella ever say she went to the bathroom and it smelled rank before she used it?
Christie says:
nothing about peeing
Christie says:
no bella don't talk about edwards bad parts if he has any
Christie says:
idk
Christie says:
the book is just like he's perfect blah blah blah
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
GARY STU
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
Twatlight series is nothing but bad fanfiction
Christie says:
lol
Christie says:
did you still want to read it?
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
kind of ... just so i can properly bag on people that like it
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
i get more pleasure out of making of shit or putting other's down when i know what they're all about
Christie says:
lol
Christie says:
so....
Christie says:
is there going to be another book?
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
YEAH
Christie says:
omg
Christie says:
no way
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
this time the whole shit from Gary Stu's perspective!
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
=D
Christie says:
this one is already way to hard to read
Christie says:
gary stu?
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
by hard to read you mean ... bad?
foo keep up! Gary Stu = Edward -- cause that's what he is!
Christie says:
lol
Christie says:
yeah its bad
Christie says:
but edwards version starts from the beginning
Christie says:
it's like his version of twilight
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
yup! i believe so ...
Christie says:
jeez
Christie says:
4 books coming out just for his perspective
Christie says:
wtf
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
you looking shit up online?
Christie says:
no
Christie says:
i'm assuming
Christie says:
cuz there's 4 on her's
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
WOAH FUCK SHE'S GONNA REWRITE ALL THE SHIT JUST FROM HIS PERSPECTIVE?!
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
DDDDDD=
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
fucking FAIL!
Christie says:
so wouldn't it make sense to do that for him
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
NEXT YOU'RE GONNA HAVE JACOB'S PERSPECTIVE
Christie says:
i mean she's already started his version of twilight
Christie says:
oh shit!
Christie says:
LOL
Christie says:
goddamn
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
i'm pretty sure she's going to try to milk this shit for all it's worth because teenagers are stupid and don't know what a good book is
Christie says:
lol
Christie says:
jane likes this book
Christie says:
she like lurves every single one
Christie says:
lol
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
DDDDD= WRRRRY JANE?!
Christie says:
lol
Christie says:
she introduced it to angel yo
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
i blame it on her stripper habits
Christie says:
HAHAHA
Christie says:
thats like 12 books
Christie says:
wait is there anything else to come on bella's perspective
Christie says:
?
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
idk? i hope not D=
Christie says:
lol
Christie says:
wait how does breaking dawn end
Christie says:
?
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
everybody dies
Christie says:
o_O
Christie says:
shut up
Christie says:
really?
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
yeah
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
everyone gets AIZEN'D
Christie says:
..............
Christie says:
well then i guess i'll just give angel the book now
Christie says:
haha
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
i don't know what the fuck happens in that book
Christie says:
then
Christie says:
what the hell!?!
Christie says:
LOL
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
YOU ACTUALLY BELIEVED ME THIS WHOLE FUCKING TIME?!
Christie says:
yeah
Christie says:
haha
Christie says:
it's easier to believe you than to read the damn book
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
you mean you don't want to read the book and you know my ending is better
Christie says:
heck yes
Christie says:
i fear that twilight series will continue
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
so you liked it at first and now you hate it?
Christie says:
i like the first book the last two were ok
Christie says:
and then this one
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
i mean at least with fucking harry potter when that shit started going down the drain we knew it was fucking ending soon
Christie says:
is killing me!
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
D= ... ten years from now you'll be able to tell your kids how you survived Twatlight?
Christie says:
lol
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
I'm putting this convo in my LJ so my f-list can lawl over Twatlight =D
Christie says:
LOL
Christie says:
ok
Christie says:
let me read it once you're done
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
imma just copy pasta ...
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
nothing really rant worthy in here D=
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
well i could rant about angel's STD ridden vago
Christie says:
lol
The rain forgot how to bring salvation says:
but ... she's not worth it
Christie says:
lol

Comments

[normalmar.livejournal.com]

I actually read the plot summary for Breaking Dawn on Wikipedia just so I could know why some people were upset with it. O_O it's very strange.

[drunken-koala.livejournal.com]

Only thing I knew about Breaking Dawn before it came out was that it had marriage and sex.
PST, YOU SHOULD READ THE TWATLIGHT THREAD ON THE FORUMS. THERE ARE A COUPLE PEOPLE BASHING IT.

AND WTF STEPHANIE MEYER GOT PAID THREE-QUATERS OF A MILLION DOLLARS IN ADVANCED TO WRITE TWATLIGHT?! FUCKING ANYONE CAN PUBLISH A BOOK AND GET PAID FOR IT NOWADAYS.
I'm sitting down and writing a young adult fiction novel; that's where all the money seems to be.

[normalmar.livejournal.com]

I've been reading the thread, it's been very entertaining. =)

[drunken-koala.livejournal.com]

It is! I heard mentionings of pedophilia!
Also, you should check out another person's stupid in the Questions thread in Misc. =D Quite lulzy, her and her vago envy and her belief of women being superior to men.

[kyoko215.livejournal.com]

I am never reading that series.

Not that I ever intened to pick it up, but now I KNOW I don't want to read it.

.... might check out the movie, though.

[drunken-koala.livejournal.com]

I'm writing a fucking book.
Stephanie Meyer proved that just about any piece of shit can get published and sell well.